January 26, 2012

Reintegration

I'm staying VERY busy in anticipation of Joshua's return...it's still not so close I can feel it but I definitely see the light at the end of the tunnel. We've talked about visiting friends in Nashville, Houston and El Paso. We've talked about a trip to Great Wolfe Lodge. We've talked about family bike rides and camping trips. We've mostly talked about just turning off the phones and computers and staying home. It's going to be great.


That said, I'm realizing more now what people mean when they talk about some of the difficulties of reintegration. I'm not worried at this point...just more aware. Today, the boy came to me and said that he was excited for Daddy to come home and sleep in the boy's room with him just like the girl sleeps with me now (I co-sleep with the baby because I'm nursing and it's just what works for us). He even pointed out the fact that he has a second bed just for Daddy (bunk beds that we separated). I was able to brush him off and say that's silly-baby girl sleeps with Mommy because she's a baby and he's a big boy. I tried to remind him about before Joshua left and how at R&R he had his own bed and we had our own bed. And then I told him about all the big boy things he and Daddy will do like fishing and buying a big boy bike but I worry that the sibling rivalry we've somehow miraculously avoided until now will make an appearance.


I'm a little anxious about what it will be like to actually be a family of four together. Other than R&R, we've never parented two children and since R&R was at Disney World, it wasn't exactly a real life experience (which is what we were going for at the time). I have zero doubts that Joshua will step up and be the amazing Dad to both kids that he's always been for the boy. Seriously, he's awesome and it's totally natural. Kind of annoying really. I majored in child development and was a nanny for years...to kids ranging from two weeks to twelve years and for families with one kid, triplets or in one case, ten kids (yeah, ten...T-E-N!) and yet, it's not uncommon for Joshua to teach me a thing or two about parenting. 


Like I said, I'm not really worried at this point, just more aware. I guess it's kind of like when you're pregnant and everyone decides that's the best time to start telling you all the pregnancy and birth horror stories they know. I've just been hearing some not so pleasant reintegration stories and I think I just need to treat them like I treated all the stories when I was pregnant. Ignore them. Prepare the best we can. Hope. Pray. And deal with whatever happens.











2 comments:

Julie F. said...

So excited for your family Brianna!!!

Jamie said...

It will just be another new normal. You guys will do great.